Pop Quiz: John Waters

Pop Quiz: John Waters

Aidin Vaziri | John Waters is known for his wickedly bad taste. But the sleaze and debauchery on display in his films like "Pink Flamingos" and "Hairspray" (now a Tony award-winning Broadway musical) have nothing on the music he's compiled for a new CD called "A John Waters Christmas." With such songs as Little Cindy's "Happy Birthday Jesus," Akim and the Teddy Vann Production Company's "Santa Claus Is a Black Man" and "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" as performed by Tiny Tim, it's sure to pack a bigger wallop at the annual office party than the bowl of spiked punch. The 59-year-old man whom William Burroughs once crowned the "Pope of Trash" pulled most of the tracks from his personal collection and says several, unsurprisingly, defined his childhood in Baltimore.


John Waters
Q: Is it normal to have nightmares after listening to Little Cindy's "Happy Birthday Jesus"?
A: She's so great because you can picture her in this little thrift shop Patty McCormick kind of bedsheet dress at some really low-end studio in the South with this really pushy Christian mother. And you can tell she only got one take because she screws it up and they don't let her do it again, which made me really, really love it. Patti Page had a really big hit record with that same song. A lot of people recorded that song but, to me, Little Cindy really sells it.
Q: I wonder what the songs you rejected sound like?
A: I guess we listened to over a thousand Christmas carols. Then we got it down to 900, then 400. It was probably a year of listening to Christmas carols. The reason I do these albums really is so I can get them back in print. Once they're in print they can get played on the radio where people can discover them. I'm trying to make you want to hear Christmas music instead of dread it.
Q: Besides listening to lots of questionable music, do you have any other special holiday traditions at your house?
A: I have this great S&M wreath on my front door that my sister-in-law made. It's like a crown of thorns made out of sticker bushes that tears at you when you walk through the door. Otherwise, everything is fairly traditional. I have to buy about 150 presents, so it's good for the economy. And this year it's my turn to cook Christmas dinner for the entire family, so it's staggering.
Q: So you literally have to bleed to spend Christmas with John Waters?
A: No, you have to take your chances. Let's put it that way.